I think it is a hard lesson when you feel you have it all together, only to have God tell you you maybe don't have it all that together after all..ahh, humility lessons.
I think it says something that I can at least laugh about such lessons and put them in the right perspective instead of beat myself up for the next week- I'm a tough critic. Like I said before, I am indeed a work in progress. Thank the dear Lord He doesn't give up on us! I'll be a hand raiser yet I just know it!!
I think "Let go and let God" will henceforth be written on my bathroom mirror.
I think the homemade ice cream making going on in my house smells awesome..but I hafta admit I'm a little worried about it tasting like it smells...Brian+Ashten in the kitchen does not always equal success...oh well, there's always Bo-Macs caramel sundaes..mmm..
I think the fact that my dear man brought home not 1 but 3 Heath bars tonight just for me, AND a package of chocolate flavored coffee might mean he's trying to work up the nerve to come clean! We will see....maybe he's just after a massage..
I think I'm ready for one big thunderstorm with lots of wind and lightning. I'm feeling cheated this year...all rain without the fun!
I'm not sure but I think Brian might have been half serious when he mentioned us moving to the mountains n living like mountain folk. Maybe that's what the chocolate was all about...or maybe he just wants the car he casually mentioned he saw for sale...
I think if my computer gives me the blue screen of death one more time it might be trying to tell me to get over Facebook already...does anyone know of an intervention group?..
I think the person that invented it was out to get all us OCD people. Or CDO's as we affectionately call it in our house. Meaning I am so OCD I can't handle being called OCD because that isn't in alphabetical order...
I'm still not over #1. Will keep trying..
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
First Formation
I've felt uninspired to post lately..but...
Last night was our first formation for the upcoming Emmaus Walk in September.
If you have never been on one, I would highly recommend it-life changing.
This one is the first I've worked. And to make it even better, my Ya Yas are right there with me. Normally, I would be waayyy out of my comfort zone. Speaking in front of people, praying out loud, well, lets just say there's a lot of putting yourself out there at a formation meet.
However, things changed a bit for me last week. And people kept asking as the day drew near if I was nervous. Honestly, I wasn't in the least. God have given me complete peace. I truly think that if He had asked me to do a talk, I would have at least not ran out of the room screaming...that's big for me.
I have always heard people go on about giving everything you are to God. About letting go of who you are, who you want to be, and letting God's plan take over. I never knew what that meant and had no clue how to do it. Sounds simple enough, but those simple things really tend to trip me up. Where's the control in that??? But at some point last week, I finally let go.
Amazing experience. Now I'm not saying that I'm forever cured of my fears, I'm a work in progress. But for those moments last night I was able to enjoy myself completely.
It was a building of people full of love for one another and for God. You could feel it, it was so alive. These were people who for the next little while will give of themselves, even though it takes time away from their normal lives, their jobs, their families. These people have pledged to serve a group looking for a deeper relationship with God, no matter how menial or how great the task may be.
If the world could be more like that room on a daily basis...wow.
It is an awesome thing to be a part of.
Last night was our first formation for the upcoming Emmaus Walk in September.
If you have never been on one, I would highly recommend it-life changing.
This one is the first I've worked. And to make it even better, my Ya Yas are right there with me. Normally, I would be waayyy out of my comfort zone. Speaking in front of people, praying out loud, well, lets just say there's a lot of putting yourself out there at a formation meet.
However, things changed a bit for me last week. And people kept asking as the day drew near if I was nervous. Honestly, I wasn't in the least. God have given me complete peace. I truly think that if He had asked me to do a talk, I would have at least not ran out of the room screaming...that's big for me.
I have always heard people go on about giving everything you are to God. About letting go of who you are, who you want to be, and letting God's plan take over. I never knew what that meant and had no clue how to do it. Sounds simple enough, but those simple things really tend to trip me up. Where's the control in that??? But at some point last week, I finally let go.
Amazing experience. Now I'm not saying that I'm forever cured of my fears, I'm a work in progress. But for those moments last night I was able to enjoy myself completely.
It was a building of people full of love for one another and for God. You could feel it, it was so alive. These were people who for the next little while will give of themselves, even though it takes time away from their normal lives, their jobs, their families. These people have pledged to serve a group looking for a deeper relationship with God, no matter how menial or how great the task may be.
If the world could be more like that room on a daily basis...wow.
It is an awesome thing to be a part of.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Summer pics
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Summer, unfortunately, is winding down. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself once my baby starts kindergarten.....
But here is a little of what we have been doing this summer.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
God and the Nursing Home
Search me God, and know my heart. Test me, and know my anxious thoughts.
This has been a part of my prayer this past week.
And we know when we ask for something in prayer He answers.
I think when I got out of bed this morning, all those parts of me that I would like to change came out in full force. I had to be at one of the nursing homes I visit monthly this morning, and I was attacked in all my weak areas on the drive there. I have to admit, I wasn't taking it too well...at all.
To say things weren't going well would be an understatement. And when I first got there, things were going downhill rapidly.
Then a new activities assistant asked me to do something different. She asked if I would mind visiting a few of the residents in their rooms. They had a couple in their one on one program-which means they are usually later stage alzheimers or dementia and can't be left alone.
They weren't sure how the ladies would react to massage, and even though I assured them we would be fine, they hovered near the doorway waiting for the worst. One was absolutely appreciative and we had a lovely visit. The other was unable to communicate well and was agitated so we simply sat and held hands. She actually was able to thank me and tell me bye as I left.
However, my third resident a dear lady diagnosed as "terminal" and was now bed bound. They asked if I would give her a hand massage. This time they left me on my own.
I went in and introduced myself and asked if I could sit beside her on the bed. Her poor hands and arms were a mess from having been stuck with different needles, and from the dying process itself. I don't know how many have had the priveledge of being a part of someone's life in their last days, but they begin to lose interest in the world going on around them. They turn inward and slowly stop communicating or being aware of anything. There were 3 or vases of beautiful flowers by her bed. Someone had placed the tv remote on her table where she could reach it. A cell phone lay beneath her hand. None of that stuff mattered to her, except the emesis basin she was clutching on her lap. She said a few words and then drifted in and out. I cannot begin to describe the peace in the room as I sat there and held that dear lady's hand.
And here I was this morning sitting on her bed after worrying over all my petty issues on the way there, and they were nothing compared to where she was. God is so amazing at putting us in situations to make us stop and listen.
God spoke volumes in that room. I am so glad I was listening.
This has been a part of my prayer this past week.
And we know when we ask for something in prayer He answers.
I think when I got out of bed this morning, all those parts of me that I would like to change came out in full force. I had to be at one of the nursing homes I visit monthly this morning, and I was attacked in all my weak areas on the drive there. I have to admit, I wasn't taking it too well...at all.
To say things weren't going well would be an understatement. And when I first got there, things were going downhill rapidly.
Then a new activities assistant asked me to do something different. She asked if I would mind visiting a few of the residents in their rooms. They had a couple in their one on one program-which means they are usually later stage alzheimers or dementia and can't be left alone.
They weren't sure how the ladies would react to massage, and even though I assured them we would be fine, they hovered near the doorway waiting for the worst. One was absolutely appreciative and we had a lovely visit. The other was unable to communicate well and was agitated so we simply sat and held hands. She actually was able to thank me and tell me bye as I left.
However, my third resident a dear lady diagnosed as "terminal" and was now bed bound. They asked if I would give her a hand massage. This time they left me on my own.
I went in and introduced myself and asked if I could sit beside her on the bed. Her poor hands and arms were a mess from having been stuck with different needles, and from the dying process itself. I don't know how many have had the priveledge of being a part of someone's life in their last days, but they begin to lose interest in the world going on around them. They turn inward and slowly stop communicating or being aware of anything. There were 3 or vases of beautiful flowers by her bed. Someone had placed the tv remote on her table where she could reach it. A cell phone lay beneath her hand. None of that stuff mattered to her, except the emesis basin she was clutching on her lap. She said a few words and then drifted in and out. I cannot begin to describe the peace in the room as I sat there and held that dear lady's hand.
And here I was this morning sitting on her bed after worrying over all my petty issues on the way there, and they were nothing compared to where she was. God is so amazing at putting us in situations to make us stop and listen.
God spoke volumes in that room. I am so glad I was listening.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Four Glorious Evenings
This is it! The week Brian and I look forward to each year. Our kids are in VBS. What does that mean?? Four evenings all to ourselves!!
Day 1. We had dinner, just the two of us, on the front porch. No whining, no refilling plates. Beautiful view watching the cows come home-literally-Heavenly. Took a long walk down the road hand in hand to watch the sun set.
Day 2. After evading my dear Ya Ya's-sorry for that:)- we took a short walk, went to town for ice cream and wound up out at my father in laws cabin on the river. Sat on the porch and watched the world float by. Then took a country drive. Decided to try the boat on day 3.
Day 3. After texting every contact I had to see if it was going to rain, Brian convinced me to take a chance and off we went up river. I haven't been on the river since we used to spend nights on his dad's house boat at the Bedford Boat Club waayy back when. Last time I went it was dark and when I stepped into the boat I kept feeling funny tickly things all over me. Lights went on, and I realized that spiders had taken over the boat, literally I was trapped in cobwebs. Yep, that was it for me. I've never seen so many of the nasty lil buggers!
So anyways, his dad had told us about an eagle's nest up river, so we decided to scope it out. When I turned to ask Brian where it was, he said "I don't know, Dad said it was past the old man's nose." Hmm?? River speak I suppose. Well, we never found it, but we did see an eagle! So we turned n headed down river to see the river bridge in town. Once again I turned and asked him how much gas it took to get around on the river. "I don't know... I probably should check...looks like we've used about that much (heholds his fingers slightly apart)." Real boyscout I got here.
On down the way a bit, we are going right along when Wham! we both lurch forward and the engine begins to sputter. We had hit a huge log. I had been teasing earlier about only having one paddle and if we had to use it we would only go in circles. My first thought was it was gonna be a cold swim to shore. (It was cold! The only thing I could find to wear was this furry lined denim jacket I had bought at a yard sale and forgot to take out of the truck. I'm sure I looked real cute in my shorts with that thing around me heading down the river-cell phone in hand of course. City slicker.) But we survived and the engine survived and we moved on. It was neat to see the bridge from underneath.
On the way back we came across 4 baby ducks. I was oohin and awwin so my sweet man stopped the boat right there and whipped around so we could chase baby ducks for me to snap a pic. (I didn't even think to bring my camera so it was all cell phone, which once again I'm sure we looked real cute out there chasing down these poor baby ducks with our boat and my cell phone.)
Finally made it back to our spot and I thought I'd be all suave n boats-man like. I hopped up on the boat, grabbed the rope and stepped out onto the step and pulled the boat in with my foot to hold it. (You see, the night before when we were checking it all out he made the smooth move of trying to step from the boat to shore and did a nice splits-kinda move when the boat started floating away.) Well, what I didn't realize was once you've been a boat for an hour, you tend to have sea legs back on dry ground. I came mighty close to falling on my face with my first step...so much for looking like I knew what I was doing...
Back to town for yet more ice cream and home to play a game of pool. Great!! And now I have a nice thunderstorm going to boot!
We have decided our final night will either be to load up the 4-wheeler in his truck and head for new trails yet to be discovered, or hiking out at the forest. Hmmm...both sound good. We will see.....
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Those Flashing Toilets
So what is a flashing toilet you are probably wondering? Weell....to my five-year-old they are incredibly frightening machines. Mechanical robots, maybe aliens from another planet, loud monsters, all just waiting to suck you down into some unknown abyss. At-ahem-my ripe old age of 32, I've kinda forgotten quite how the five-year-old mind works. But I do remember fearing many things..some of which I still do....
A flashing toilet is actually the sensor automatic flushing toilet they have in many public places. I guess these modern marvels are in place so we genteel folks don't have to dirty our hands with the handle. You know, right after we touch the ends of the toilet paper touched by the last person (I actually tear a piece off first) and then touch the equally germ-ridden stall handle (I always use my knuckles) then after washing your hands touch the door knob to exit the bathroom (I use my elbow/fist/butt/pinkie). Yes, I am a germaphobe. (I also use my foot to flush). I guarantee this will all go through your mind next time you hit a public restroom:).
Anyways, I digress. These toilets are a cause of much distress to my old-fashioned minded daughter-not that she really likes flushing any toilet. She used to actually run as soon as she hit the handle. Then we moved onto just not flushing at all....Anyways, we have gotten to the point that I have to go into the stall with her and actually put my hand over the sensor-but of course "don't look at me Mom"-until she finishes her business and makes it out the stall door. Then, and only then, am I allowed to remove my hand-which gets really tricky if I actually need to use the toilet too...I am sure we make for good entertainment when we are out. Case in point...
Today I took Alex and his best bud and Ashten and her best friend to McDonald's for lunch-which by the way yes I do spend much of my time and cash with and to that stupid red clown. (Whatever happened to Hamburgler anyways? Ronald just seems so much more sinister.) So we are on our way out and Ashten's friend needs to go. No problem, she takes off on her own after handing me her drink and lovely coveted Mighty Kids toy. But then, Ashten decides her friend can't go without her, she needs to go too, and hands me her stuff. So I'm standing here at the trashcan holding all this stuff standing with the boys and trying to text, of course, when Ashten opens the door and says "Mom, its a flash toilet, you have to come with me." To which I reply something to the effect of "I have all this stuff to hold, you can be a big girl." "No Mom!" "Ashten, someday you are gonna have to do this yourself, I'm not coming. You can do this. If you are scared, get summer to go in with you." "No!" So Alex's friend kindly takes pity on me and says he will watch their stuff if I sit it all on top the trash can. And all the while standing beside us is this old guy just having a good ol' belly chuckle at the whole thing.
A flashing toilet is actually the sensor automatic flushing toilet they have in many public places. I guess these modern marvels are in place so we genteel folks don't have to dirty our hands with the handle. You know, right after we touch the ends of the toilet paper touched by the last person (I actually tear a piece off first) and then touch the equally germ-ridden stall handle (I always use my knuckles) then after washing your hands touch the door knob to exit the bathroom (I use my elbow/fist/butt/pinkie). Yes, I am a germaphobe. (I also use my foot to flush). I guarantee this will all go through your mind next time you hit a public restroom:).
Anyways, I digress. These toilets are a cause of much distress to my old-fashioned minded daughter-not that she really likes flushing any toilet. She used to actually run as soon as she hit the handle. Then we moved onto just not flushing at all....Anyways, we have gotten to the point that I have to go into the stall with her and actually put my hand over the sensor-but of course "don't look at me Mom"-until she finishes her business and makes it out the stall door. Then, and only then, am I allowed to remove my hand-which gets really tricky if I actually need to use the toilet too...I am sure we make for good entertainment when we are out. Case in point...
Today I took Alex and his best bud and Ashten and her best friend to McDonald's for lunch-which by the way yes I do spend much of my time and cash with and to that stupid red clown. (Whatever happened to Hamburgler anyways? Ronald just seems so much more sinister.) So we are on our way out and Ashten's friend needs to go. No problem, she takes off on her own after handing me her drink and lovely coveted Mighty Kids toy. But then, Ashten decides her friend can't go without her, she needs to go too, and hands me her stuff. So I'm standing here at the trashcan holding all this stuff standing with the boys and trying to text, of course, when Ashten opens the door and says "Mom, its a flash toilet, you have to come with me." To which I reply something to the effect of "I have all this stuff to hold, you can be a big girl." "No Mom!" "Ashten, someday you are gonna have to do this yourself, I'm not coming. You can do this. If you are scared, get summer to go in with you." "No!" So Alex's friend kindly takes pity on me and says he will watch their stuff if I sit it all on top the trash can. And all the while standing beside us is this old guy just having a good ol' belly chuckle at the whole thing.
This is actually the second time this week I've had some old guy laughing at me as I deal with my kids in public. I may need to sit down and take some time to ponder on that.
But I wonder if the guy at McDonald's really had a clue as to what a flashing toilet is?
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